January 30, 2018

My heart is bleeding

And it’s stopped beating

Laying here

In unspoken glory

No more story

Too late to mourn

Too fresh to leave

And all I seem to do is grieve

Deceive deceive

Fresh tears fall down

Upon the snow

I can’t let go of all I know

Drop me off

Leave me be

Don’t you see

I’m not even good enough for me.

(I can’t break free)

Goodbye goodnight

But there’s nothing good about it

And I will fight I will kick

I will scream until I’m sick

But not one damned thing

Will ever do the trick

So let me be

Let me bleed

Let me cry until I can’t see

And go ahead tell me what it is you think I need.

Fucking hypocrisy

As if I have leprosy

And you treat me like a sad disease

I don’t need your sympathy

Your pity

Your “sad for me” look

Take your coat from my hook

And shuffle on by.

I’m goddamned tired of living a lie.

Now leave me be and let my heart finally die.

Originally written January 30, 2018

By Erin de Blois

———————–

This one was born from a lot of heartache. It’s one I do not personally re-read often. It may not be the best writing I have ever done but it is perhaps some of the most raw and naked emotion I have spilled onto a page.

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